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Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

We’ve all had that “WTF” moment in a relationship. Wondering why and how we found this person attractive in the first place. What led us to make such a bad choice in a romantic partner.

Here are 10 mistakes we all make at some point in our love lives that you’re probably unaware of.

  1. Going too fast with commitment and having sex before you know anything about the person.
  2. Not taking time to heal from your previous relationship. Most people immediately jump into a new relationship or end one to start a new one. You can’t run away from yourself, so stop trying.
  3. Stop trying to control your partner. If they are violent, leave. They probably won’t change. Accept them as is or cut them and stop wasting time. Don’t confuse abuse with love. I was good at it.
  4. I don’t buy that all opposites attract bullshit, because it’s bullshit. You have to share a lot in common to make the relationship fun and exciting.
  5. Have your own hobbies and friends that you can share with each other. But take time for yourself so you don’t lose your sense of yourself. You have to trust.
  6. Your partner does not complete you; they are in addition to what you already have. If you are a couple and you are looking for your “meal ticket”, you might find it. And if you’re so superficial, it may work for you, but you won’t be happy. At least I wouldn’t. Being able to support yourself without a partner. To be independent.
  7. The little red flags you ignore at the start will lead to bigger ones down the road. Many get into relationships for the wrong reasons. And when red flags fly, they ignore them because they’re tired of “dating,” or they decide to “settle down” because they can’t be alone.
  8. SPEND TIME ALONE! It’s a must. How will you know who you are or what you want out of a relationship if you’re still with someone? What do you have to offer someone? Anything? Other than a fake “I love you” and casual sex.
  9. It is a commitment. You never knowingly commit an act that will hurt your partner! NEVER. And you certainly respect them enough to never do anything that would risk losing them. Relationships are hard work; well, those who are healthy are. Anyone can “be” with someone.
  10. Don’t fall into the “that couple” rut. Keep it fun. Plan things out. Take turns planning spontaneous day or weekend outings, stay active together, cook together, clean together, challenge each other and support each other. Keep communication open and make your partner feel safe.

Actually, I don’t know if any of the above exists. I thought I did all of this in my previous relationship. But for some reason, any other swinging cock was better than me.

I was consistently PUT 2nd or 3rd best no matter what I was doing. I began to despise the “simp” nature in which I moved slowly.

I will do ANYTHING for my partner, and 99.9999% of the time, I make it my priority. But. It was never enough.

The most important thing is to find someone who loves you like you and wants to be loved. If you don’t like yourself, you will find someone to treat you accordingly.

Trust me, I found them, and it hasn’t been an easy journey.

Wouldn’t the above be ideal? Where are you, my Juliet?

Good meeting!

No seriously.

Good luck.